Sooner Or Later

The sooner I fall behind, the more time I have to catch up.

~Author Unknown

I have a problem. Actually, I have a lot of problems. At this precise moment, however, I am most concerned with one very specific problem: I am a procrastinator.

I do not recall how I came to be so deeply entrenched in the world of procrastination. Did I always live here? It’s entirely possible. In junior high and high school, I never studied. I was the sort that didn’t need to. Instead, I would stay up all night long reading books – many of which featured half-naked men and women with faulty clothing and ill-fitting lingerie upon their covers. (Note that this was JUNIOR HIGH SCHOOL. I have long since left such high-brow literature behind.) In college, I chose majors that allowed me to support this no-studying, much-reading habit. Still, I can recall having papers due – often papers that I had been made aware of in the first week of class – and not starting them until the night before they needed to be turned in. In fact, now that I consider it, I think that may have been the ONLY time I wrote papers – the night before they were due. For me, the “you must write this essay before you leave the room” sort of test was the very best sort, as it saved me from having to write that same essay right before the next class.

These reflections support the theory that I’ve lived in Mundo Procrastinato for many, many years. I’ve certainly suffered the consequences of it plenty of times. Yet I persist. Why?

Right now, for example, I am supposed to be composing two separate documents that are due tomorrow. What am I doing at this crucial time? Writing this essay, which will get me NO closer to having the documents that are actually DUE completed. Also interesting? I’ve known about this deadline for three weeks, yet have typed out nary a word.

Even more interesting? Before I could even begin writing this essay, I was suddenly struck by the realization that it was ABSOLUTELY ESSENTIAL that I change the colors of my desktop theme immediately. I was clearly not going to be able to do any work – or writing – with that teal color floating about. (Oddly enough, I’ve been able to live with the teal color for a number of months, and only now noticed what a hindrance it is.) Once I made this determination, it took QUITE some time to come up with just the right color combination to promote productivity. I think I have it now, but time will tell.

Recently – over the past few weeks, which happens to be precisely the amount of time that this project has been hanging over my head – I’ve developed the need to engage in all sorts of activities that are not this project. I’ve needed to do quite a lot of cleaning, and also shopping. There have been websites to research, and magazines to read. When I finally force myself to take a seat in front of the computer, I usually realize that I am FAMISHED and have to take a break for food. This has had the unfortunate side effect of contributing to an uncomfortable pressure from my ever-tightening waistbands, which – of course – means that I have to take extra time to focus on exercise. Or at least take the time to THINK about focusing on exercise. With so much going on, is it any wonder that I haven’t had a chance to begin these documents?

And now, it’s also clear that I won’t be able to begin any serious work until I think a bit about the nature of my procrastination problem. And – in order to do that – I will of course have to spend a bit of time looking up procrastination quotes online. That is a very good use of time, as it produces immediate results.

This quote makes me feel quite good:

“Procrastination is the key to prolonging life.”
~Anonymous

Why yes, I think, it’s actually an investment. How clever I am to procrastinate, and enjoy myself, while everyone else is preoccupied with deadlines. But then I continue on, and – as the quotes grow progressively more ominous – begin to have doubts about the above assertion. For one thing, if someone is making a medical claim like this one, shouldn’t they be willing to attach their name to it?

After that thought, these quotes seem to hold a lot more clout, unfortunately for me:

In any moment of decision the best thing you can do is the right thing, the next best thing is the wrong thing, and the worst thing you can do is nothing.
- Theodore Roosevelt

Put off for one day and ten days will pass by.
- Korean Proverb

The chief cause of failure and unhappiness is trading what we want most for what we want at the moment.
- Anonymous

After all is said and done, there is usually more said than done.
- Anonymous

“Procrastination is, hands down, our favorite form of self-sabotage.”
- Alyce Cornyn-Selby


Well. This is just awful. It is clear that my proclivity toward procrastination is not one of my better qualities. In fact, after reading these quotes, I’ve determined that it may be one of my worst traits. I can tell you one thing: There is NO WAY that I am going to be able to work on those documents now – not with this hanging over my head. No, the path that I must follow is clear. I am obviously going to have to spend some time researching this fault of mine and what can be done about it. I’ll have to get on that right away… well, maybe I’ll have a quick snack first.